nEUROtic Travels: August 19th: Nowhere

I have really procrastinated on this one.

I am in the city now and have reached the point where I’m supposed to be up and running. I am currently lying in my bed naked at 7:30 AM typing a Blog post. Give me a few more months.

Home for a few days was nice. Juggling between all three homes (Mom, Dad, Step-Dad) kept me in travel mode. I kept trying to eat healthily but each parental unit would take me out and want me to have a martini, a beer, or a glass of red wine (Mom, Dad, Step-Dad).

I took an early Sunday bus back up to the city to be part of a cool Acting competition film thingie called, “Audition”. I’d tell you how awesome it was and all the free food and the gigantic film crew…but then telling you I was cut after the first round would be even sadder.

So let’s escape my current life and reflect over my amazing, awesome Eurotrip.

Here’s some insufficiently thought out lists

Favorite Places:

Interlaken (for the excursions)
Barcelona (tie)
Amsterdam (tie)
Berlin
Dublin
Prague
Rome

Places You Don’t Have to Visit Just Ask Me About Them:

Zurich, Switzerland
Verona, Italy
Dresden, Germany
Nuremberg, Germany (Unless you want to see a HUGE Nazi/WWII Museum)

Places I’m Now Dying To Visit (in Europe):

Greece, in general
Istanbul, Turkey
Stockholm, Sweden
Wherever Girl With The Dragon Tattoo Took Place, Sweden
Copenhagen, Denmark
Oslo, Norway
Krakow, Poland
Budapest, Hungary
Croatia, in general
Amalfi Coast, Italy

Most Beautiful Man-Made Things:

Gaudi Church, Barcelona
The David, Florence
Eiffel Tower w/ Flashing Lights, Paris
Sistine Chapel, Vatican
Random Statue of Boy Floating on Raft Representing Death, Verona
Rome
Everything else Gaudi

Favorite Quotes:

Australian Pub Crawl Moderator to me, not knowing I am from America, “God, aren’t all these fucking Americans such retards?”
Drunk Italian man in Milan, “America sucks, man! Did you know, did you know there is a place from, there is a place called Rhode Island, and people actually live there. AND they’re okay about it”
Stranger after asking to use my phone, “FUCK YOU!”

Most Beautiful Natural Scenery:

Interlaken, Switzerland
Naples, Italy (outside the city)
County Wicklow, Ireland

Worst Meals:

Pig Ears, Madrid
That’s all folks! (said Porky Pig, whose ears I ate)

Best Museums:

Anne Frank House, Amsterdam (Only if you read the book right before)
Sex Machine Museum, Prague
Sex Machine Museum, Prague
Video Game Museum, Berlin
Vatican Museum, Vatican (that’s probably not what it’s called)
Accademia Gallery, Florence
Dali Museum, Everywhere
Taxidermy shop I went to in Paris (Stuffed Giraffe, Polar Bear, Elephant, etc.)

Best Pub Crawls

Berlin Anti-Pub Crawl
Dublin Musical Pub Crawl
Bruges Pub Crawl (despite what happened)

Places I Must Go Back To

Amsterdam
Rome
Berlin
Interlaken

Places Where Your Money Will Disappear

Interlaken
Everywhere but Prague and Berlin

The Best Moments, no particular order

Sky Diving, Interlaken
Night Out w/ Geoffrey in Prague that culminated in awful strip club
Night Out w/ Notallowedtosay in Paris drinking cheap wine by the E.tower
First Time I did Karaoke in Florence
Soccer Game at German Beer Hall w/ Lena in Berlin
Canyoning with 12-year-old Boy Scouts, Interlaken…that sounds creepy

I thought about writing a section on what I learned but that list includes a lot of basic social skills that it might be embarrassing to admit I didn't know before.

The greatest and most painful part of traveling was being alone. In an acting class, after being assigned Rainer Maria Rilke's "Letters to a Young Poet", I complained about his praise of solitude. As Rilke wrote, "It is good to be solitary, for solitude is difficult. That something is difficult must be one more reason for us to do it." I politely suggested that that sucked balls. I did not want to be alone. The teacher looked at me with melancholy, knowing eyes and told me to shut up. I think now, having been alone a considerable deal in sometimes stressful situations, I'm beginning to sadly/happily/ambivalently understand what he was talking about.

Not Rilke. The teacher.

That I should shut up.

Before I end this saga, I should take a moment to give a shout out to my Dad.

Back in the day (somewhere in March), he said he wanted to fund a 3-month Eurotrip for me. I told him that I couldn't because by my age Ryan Gosling had been in the Notebook and my greatest accomplishment thus far was playing Seymour in Little Shop of Horrors in High School. He told me, verbatim, to stop being a pussy. So I went.

It is a priceless gift (while at the same time...really expensive) and I hope one day, after my children's book goes platinum, to send you on an equally amazing trip. 'You' being my Dad, not you whoever is reading this. That'd be absurdly nice.

Love you, Dad.

So…that’s it. Depressing.

I am soon to move to (probably) Brooklyn.

I got another copy of Anna Karinininininina and have a 1/5 left.

I spent yesterday buying an iron, 7 bags of baby carrots and working on a short story about the Bruges Pub Crawl.

I went to the gym about a week ago and am still having trouble walking.

I am most likely celebrating my Birthday alone.

C’est La Vie, France.

I am thinking of doing a walking tour of NYC or maybe even a Pub Crawl just to remember the good ol’ days.

Please, if you ever are planning a Eurotrip, feel free to contact me. I won’t really know how to help but I can certainly tell you what not to do. Also, check out couchsurfing.org. I am going to force myself to use it next time I am abroad.

I've started a blog of (hopefully) comedic rants and stories at http://sexdrugsanxiety.wordpress.com/

Since, to those who have trudged through this depressing post, you are thinking, "WHERE CAN I GET MORE!"

Thank you for reading, if even once, these posts. If you have any thoughts, questions or you want to hire me as a comedian for a Bat or Bar Mitzvah please contact me.

May you all travel often, alone and safely but not too safely,

Like or Love,

Gianmarco

Oh yeah.

Here are pictures from the Monica Lewinsky Shot…